PURSUANT TO SECTIONS 13-192 TO 13-919

I have been informed that I owe the state of Maryland $6,003.27 because of an insurance lapse on my car.

I have been threatened that "any State income tax refund otherwise due you (will) be intercepted and applied toward (my) indebtedness."

So I guess it's a collection letter.

I have been dealing with a lot of those, since my older brother's medical treatment up to and including his amputation was not covered by any insurance, and my home is his mailing address.

The first one is usually fairly nice, stating the amount owed with even an apology about if the check crosses this letter in the mail.


The second warns of possible legal action, and every letter after that is simply more and more menacing.


So I've been accustomed to reading these sort of "send us the money immediately or else you will die."

And with this one, I have an ace up my sleeve.

I haven't even been IN the state of Maryland since 1999, and unless my truck is making night-time beamings there, I haven't had an automobile registered in the state of Maryland for that same amount of time.

I think I'm safe.

BACK TO BACK

I am not a young person by any stretch of the imagination.

The grey hairs are there.

I've got the wrinkles and bulges that prove with the battle between my body and gravity, gravity is certainly winning.

My dress size keeps increasing as my memory doesn't.

But overall, I am pretty health and spry.

Until I move unexpectedly.

And this afternoon, my dog EXPLODED from beneath my computer chair and caused me to move in just the unexpected way that you normally would never move.







And your back, no matter how healthy and strong it is, is not designed to move.

I am hobbling around like a true little old lady now.

TWO IS COMPANY, THREE IS A CROWD....

Feeding a crowd is a lot different than feeding just a couple of people.

Today I feed 13 people.


Well, sort of.


 A real true-blue Mormon woman would have begun baking bread at dawn, gathering fresh eggs from nests and creating biscuits from scratch.





I?

I got on the internet and ordered Pizza Hut.

Although I did make a chicken casserole almost homemade for the other four people I fed.

And that counts for something, .... doesn't it?

RELATIVE HUMIDITY

According to Wikipedia, "Relative humidity is the ratio of the partial pressure of water vapor in an air-water mixture to the saturated vapor pressure of water at a prescribed temperature."



My little temperature/humidity gauge right here on my desk says the humidity currently is 41%,


To me, relative humidity means that here, in Arizona, 41% humidity is stifling. 

While 41% humidity in Florida is fairly dry.

FILES ON TOP OF FILES

I have developed a unique method of filing important papers.

(And why the heck shouldn't it be "aN unique method"? It isn't, but I don't know why)

I stick it in a manila folder (why "manila"? Because they originally were made from manila hemp), and file it under whatever file folder strikes my fancy at the moment.

So a lot of things get stuck in "family", if it has something to do with anyone I'm related to - "animals" is about the animals, etc. etc. etc. (and why is it okay to use repetitive etc. when it usually isn't?).

But "Church" ends up holding the ward directory, RS lists and compassionate service assignments - but "food storage" has it's own file.

Why does rental property end up under "rental" instead of "2048 Santa Rosa"?

I have no answers - I just know I'll end up retrieving it if I leave it as such.

SICKER THAN AN OSTRICH

Dogs get a bad run of things.

Think about it.







A dog's life - dog tired - you dirty dog - going to the dogs - can't teach an old dog new tricks....



The only good one, I could come up with was being a lucky dog.




And today I could relate to being sicker than a dog.



I don't become ill very often, but when I do, I often feel I am making up for lost opportunities.

NO CHANGE, NO CHANGE

I hate change.

I like familiarity, I like habit, I like doing the same things the same way I always have.

Some new things are interesting and exciting, but most of the time I will still go back to my "old" way of doing things.

I also like conformity.

I want all normal daily, normal functions to just operate in one normal way.

For example, I hate hate HATE that every single ATM machine has to do it 'differently' - I want them to all work the exact same way.

I am terrible about the concept of having DIFFERENT passwords for every single account and card - my memory explodes at the thought.

And I just got a "new" (i.e. DIFFERENT) debit card from my bank.

With a "new" (i.e. DIFFERENT) account number. And a "new" (i.e. DIFFERENT) PIN code.

Do you realize what this means?




Every single Internet account that I have which HAS my debit card information now must be updated and changed (i.e. DIFFERENT).

I want my old debit account.

AN OPENED WINDOW

I finally finished clearing out one corner of my room that has been the stashing place for thousands (literally, I am afraid) of old file, notebooks, random photographs, and (I am being brutally honest here) mouse spoor/feces/dung (yes, that's what was underneath all the paperwork).

I cleaned everything up nicely, and then immediately filled it back up, just with newer stacks of old files, notebooks, random photographs.

But there now was a clear opening to a window that has been shuttered and curtained for the past several years.






So I opened it.

What is there about new air currents - different scents floating through the window - a completely novel view of my mountains?




Now that I've opened it, I hope I never shut it again.

DANGERS OF THE GARDEN OF EDEN

I live in what is called upper chaparral in lower Arizona.


Most people call it the desert, but that really isn't correct.

We get enough rain throughout the year to have mesquite trees, yucca, grasslands and even a green green landscape a couple times a year if we get the good monsoons.

And right now it looks like the garden of eden.





But us natives have mixed feelings about this.

The more greenery, the more that will end up dead and dried and potential fire fuel

And since we still have the scars of our Monument Fire from 2011 - 31,000 acres burned - and more than just the landscape was burned.













So personally? I'd rather just settle for year-round dust and brown, barren landscape.

IN THE MIDST OF A WHIRLPOOL

I love organization.

No, love isn't a strong enough word - I ADORE organization.

I spend hours, days, weeks, in office supply stores.

Give me clear, or even better, colored coordinated bins - drawer organizers - flowered file folders - every color Sharpie under the rainbow - desks of every shape and size.

My favorite job as a  temp was always overhauling the file systems, and making them logical, easy AND coordinated by color or a certain font style.

I could, and have, gotten lost in office projects for days. My poor kids can tell you how almost every Saturday of their childhood they were dragged to my office, put in the conference room with a video and a McDonald's Happy Meal, and left alone for hours while mommy indexed, tabled, arranged and harmonized.


So since I have been in a rather prolonged funk lately, I bought myself a new printer yesterday (the other one had died several days previously).

And since I had to install it, I decided to take my computer apart and put it back together in a more logical format.

Which meant I had to move my desk from the wall.

Which meant I had to take a whole lot of my office paraphernalia off the desk.

Which meant I had to rearrange it.

And since I was already moving things, why not move the file cabinets into a more accessible location.

I think you have the picture now.

I am going to sleep tonight with my entire room in complete disarray.

But, boy, am I look forward to working with it more tomorrow.

MONEY MONEY MONEY

The bank has a different attitude towards my money than I do.

When I say "MY" money, I am actually talking about my husband's money - I haven't worked for any real space or time for about seven years now.

And the bank thinks that since MY money is not really MY money, that the bills OBVIOUSLY are going to be paid from my HUSBAND'S money, so why not take it right out of HIS account?

Today, I needed to visit our bank, and explain very gently, using words of no-more-than two syllables at any time, that although my husband EARNS the money, I am the one who SPENDS it.


And that mainly means PAY THE BILLS.

Since today was the FIRST payment on a personal loan we have taken out, the bank (incorrectly) assumed that payment would be coming out of my HUSBAND's account, not mine.

And since he only had $15 in his account, it went BOUNCE BOUNCE BOUNCE.

It's corrected, and they have my instructions that even though I am the poorer one, I am the one who makes certain everyone gets their money.

And if they want THEIR money every month, they better ask ME.

SUNSET

We have incredible sunsets where I live.






These may be downloaded from the internet (because I can't get to my own cell phone photos), but I swear on my Boy Scout badge they are a fair representation of what I see night after night.