WHAT IF WOMEN HAD WRITTEN THE BOOK OF MORMON

1 Sarah 1:1 "I, Sarah, was raised in Jerusalem, and our Young Women leaders challenged us to begin keeping a journal. It's gonna be kinda difficult - paper isn't always around, and I sure as heck am not going to engrave this. So maybe if I just keep writing inside the hem of my abaya and use some of the shorthand that Suah is learning at school.

So let me tell you about this trip my dad took us on - away from Jerusalem, away from ANY type of market or shopping, and make us CAMP in the middle of NOwhere. He got the boys on his side telling them they could earn all sort of badges out there, but even Mom was mad at him. But Nephi came up with the idea of simply sailing off, so we did, and we're in a very nice country now with better weather (cleared up my skin like amazingly), bigger crops, and lots of animals.

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2 Wafiyyah 54:1 "We are still dealing with the stupid War of 717 - men seem to think that it's noble to kill each and other and die if they have a Title or a War or something with Capital Letters That Will Look Important Some Day In A History Book.

So we women just keep doing the hunting and gathering and raising the kids while the guys trot off to middle America with their Army buddies to camp, talk, and play solider. And then send back demanding more food, supplies, and beer to be delivered to them. It's insane. Why anyone thinks they should actually be put in charge of our society is beyond my understanding.

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Book of Tarub: "It has been over 500 years since Christ appeared to and taught our foremothers in New Jerusalem, and we have continued to practice and share his teachings of love for one another, compassion and trust.

However, the men have begun to re-discover the taste of beef, and the juvenile practice of spear hunting. They are rapidly becoming competitive and emotional about the silliest things - like how many points the Aletites led the Moronites by in half-time.

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Book of Nabihah: "It has been over 1,000 years since the appearance of Christ to our fore-mothers, and while almost all the men are dead in this last great battle, we women of the Nabilah settlement have been concentrating on editing all these records and creating a condensed version of our history.

Besides spiritual matters, we have included our top 125 recipes, cleaning tips and how to make fashionable yet modest clothing at home, as well as a new-mothers handbook for babies.