Friday, September 21, 2012

PUSHING UP DAISIES


We don't like talking about certain things. 


It's fun to gossip about what your neighbors may (or may not) be doing. We love complaining about our life and our situation at the moment. We moan and groan and over-think little comments or actions until they become huge matters simply by our over-attention on them/
We LOVE talking about the Hollywood stars' lives splattered over the front page of those scandal rags at the check-out counters. But when they become feeble, confined to a wheelchair, breathing only with the aid of a respirator, you don't hear anything about them until they actually die.
Words can distance us from acknowledging something we don't want to talk or even think about.
Death is one of those things.
It's amazing how many euphemisms we commonly use instead of actually saying the words, "S/he DIED." 
"She passed."  "She departed." (that one I love - sounds like she caught the last train to Georgia) "She recently departed" (oh, she caught that earlier train to Georgia). "She has gone beyond" (well, then she's obviously going all the way to the East Coast now).
Yesterday my mare Sally was euthanized and buried south of our house.
It was an easy decision - Sally was old, she kept losing weight regardless of how much food she ate, the vet said she simply didn't have much time left.
And after watching both my parents slowly die of cancer and multiple strokes, it was a relief to make the choice to deliberately end her life and end her pain.
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Now, can I ask you a question? Are you a strict vegetarian? No? But while you do try to limit red meat and eat more fruits and vegetable, you just can't do without the occasional hamburger or that roasted chicken.
See, we have no problem with the concept of a living animal dying to provide us with those things.
But I am always surprised by how compassionate people become when they learn you have "put down" a pet. I guess we all get emotionally invested with our animals - at least, I know I do. And there seems to be a HUGE line between cows = hamburger and the cute pet ducks in your backyard = roast duck on the grill.
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The expression "pushing up daisies" is one of those sweetish euphemisms, which also was the name of an exceptionable (and short-lived) television show.

So in honor of Sally, I am going to plant some daisies - and also some sunflowers and whatever low-maintenance wildflowers I can find -all over the area where she is buried.

And I am going to try to be brave about using real words - like death, and dying, the end of life and such - both in honor of her and recognition that my family will have to be dealing with mine before too terribly long.

Although I must admit I do simply like the daisy expression.

1 comment:

McKinley {Haolepinos} said...

Ohhhh What a sad and hard week for you!! I am so so so sorry!!! I think anyone who has a heart naturally grows attached to their pets and something as amazing as a horse... those animals are spectacular and their spirits are so tangible!! Plus they develop a real sense of loyalty to those who care for them so the bond grows that much stronger. I know that Sally will be missed and I know she will be there waiting for you at heavens gates... because who would want to be in heaven if ALL their family members couldn't be there? She will be waiting for you!!!