BEING OVERLOOKED

The sacrament is administered every week in our church services. It is usually blessed and passed by one of a multitude of teenage boys with hair in their eyes, pants low on their hips and ties casually unloosened to maintain the 'cool' image.

And the boys learn a carefully orchestrated system of passing the bread and water to the congregation to ensure that everyone present has an opportunity to partake of it if they wish. Going row by row, section by section, and even going out into the foyer for any parents forced to take refuge there with unruly children.

I sit in the front pew, far over to the left, not out of a show of piety, but to keep my good ear turned to whoever is speaking and my bad ear facing the noisy congregation to try to ignore the conversations, murmurs and shrieks of toddlers who really really REALLY want that toy which mommy just put away.

So normally I am the first one offered the bread after our bishopric has some.

This past Sunday, I wasn't.

The young man passing the sacrament walked right past me and went on to the next row. I finally caught one by the elbow as they were finishing up and grabbed a piece of the bread, not feeling particularly spiritually motivated but out of a sense of obligation.

Same thing happened with the water - I had to stop another one of the teenagers, and then halt him again as he immediately began walk away once I had picked up the sacramental cup of water, and actually force him to wait to accept the empty cup back as it was normally orchestrated.


So I sat, considering some things.

Am I that unremarkable? That vanilla, that commonplace? That easy to overlook? Or could it be that someone had 'suggested' that Sis. Wiltfong didn't really 'need' the sacrament, and was a not-so-subtle way to point out my many mistakes, social gaffes and harsh words spoken in haste?

And then I realized that this was pride whispering in my ear. Thinking that I was important enough for an elaborate plan of avoidance to have been devised. Considering myself as an insignificant part of God's kingdom here on earth.

No, it had been two teenage boys, stuffed with bursting hormones, adolescent minds mainly concerned with not tripping over their own feet as they publicly did what we LDSers consider our highest form of worship outside of our temples.

But next week I may wear something brighter.

SHUFFLE SHUFFLE SHUFFLE

Before you invite an entire house-load of guests over for the next long weekend, you spend at least a few seconds figuring out who is going to sleep where and with whom.

It might be as simple as putting all married couples together.

Perhaps a bit trickier with the boyfriend/girlfriend situation.

Then all women in one area - all guys in another? Or mix and match? First come, first served?












With horses, some additional factors will usually come into play.

For example, will one horse keep the other from eating?

Could there be prolonged battle sessions with kicks, squeals and high-speed chases?

And how do you mix up the sexes? Put the old girls together? Keep the colt with the gelding? Where to put the two mares that keep coming into heat?






At least they normally don't expect Martha Stewart welcome packets.

Oh, no. They do.

A WRINKLE IN TIME

Okay, some things don't make sense to me.

Why do we have speed limits when we all (including the cops) automatically drive faster than what is posted?

We American women seem to consider ourselves liberated - so why do we purchase and wear nylons (stockings absolutely and completely guaranteed to NOT last)?

And why do we spend $280 MILLION dollars a year on making ourselves look younger?

I googled "laugh lines" - and came up with How to Get Rid of Laugh Lines, How To Exercise To Get Rid Of Laugh Lines , and Laugh Lines Around the Mouth – The Most Effective Way of Getting Rid of Laugh Lines .

Someone needs to explain this to me - you are trying to get rid of a VISIBLE reminder of past happiness.

Yesterday, while driving home from Tucson and trying at the same time to eat a Frosty while merging onto rush-hour traffic on I-10, I looked in the mirror to try to wipe off the chocolate ice cream off my nose.

And I saw, for the first time, the visible lines around my mouth which are there even when I am NOT grinning.

I could not have been prouder.

THE ALPHABET STORY

This is harder than I thought - and I did cheat just a bit. Thanks to MaryAnne for the challenge - instructions follow:

Directions: See if you can write a story of exactly 26 sentences. But here is the hard part: Make the first sentence start with an a, the second with a b, the third with a c and so on through the alphabet. (For x you may cheat and use a word beginning with the prefix ex.)

Try and see if you can get through the entire alphabet with your story!


Although she had felt no anxiety about the long drive, the trip suddenly felt overwhelming. Besides the sheer distance involved, the mountains, normally viewed as part of the friendly horizon, seemed daunting and dark. Challenges had been part of her upbringing, and this sensation of despair was unfamiliar. Darkness was rapidly falling, and she realized a decision must be reached quickly. Either to give up before the journey began, or find some place to stay the night. Finally she resolved to keep moving on. Going forward

However, no friendly neon hotel gleamed on the horizon. It might simply be further off the road - just a mile or do to the east or west. Karma, good or bad, would decide her fate.

Lingering while the last twinges of twilight touched the landscape, she suddenly realized the absurdity of the situation. Maybe she was looking for danger. No, she thought, she was too sensible for that. Of course, she was a logical, practical traveler who could deal with this situation. Perhaps she just needed to taste a treacherous position. Queerly, she knew she had never been even close to jeopardy.


Racing back to the highway, she also dragged the map out. Scanning for local towns, she was frustrated by the amount of open land.



Trembling for the first time since the trip began, she actually considered the possibilities. Under the stars, camping? Vacillating between unrealistic options like wandering down to the riverbank? Wacky concepts - searching for xenoliths under starlight - yearning for the tall dark stranger to rescue her - zounds!