A CAT SANDWICH

The dog is snuggled up against my side onto of the bed.






She settles down with just the lower half of her body against me.






Then the cat slips in underneath the covers between the two of us.







And happily goes to sleep for as long as she can.

MARYLAND IN NOVEMBER

I took a month off.


REALLY took it off.



Went to Maryland and hung around with my oldest daughter and grandkids.



I slept... a LOT. I had the perfect excuse - "Hey, I'm still on Arizona time!"




I ate... a LOT. Calories don't count when you're on vacation, right?




I read... a LOT. My daughter had a bunch of books for me, and I had one from my book club that I needed to finish.




It was nice.

BEING A SUBSTITUTE PARENT

I don't mind stepping into a parental role sometimes.



My kids are grown, and sometimes you need a mom around.




When you are shopping with a crying baby and a toddler throwing a tantrum.




When you need to change a diaper and there's no place to do it.



When you are working extra hours and your kid needs to be somewhere.




I was what the Army calls a "geographical single parent" for WAY too many years to not appreciate all the many, MANY people who stepped in and helped me.




So I am happy when I can return the favor.

AIN'T EASY ANYMORE

Once of the reasons I got hooked on amazon.com was that they seemed to have EVERYthing imaginable.

Well, that, and it didn't cost anything more to have something shipped to me in the middle of nowhere right on the Mexican border.

But they seem to carry EVERYthing that you can think of.

Except when you are looking for a extra-large size V-neck tee shirt.

I use them as nightshirts - and over the years, I have simply worn them out - so I needed a couple of new ones.

HA.

Amazon.com has extra-large tee shirts - but no V-necks.

They have V-necks - but not in extra-large.

There are very sexy lingerie - low-slung men's pj bottoms - but nothing I want.

Hmm... where else can I look?!?

OKAY, NOW LET'S GET BACK UP ON THE HORSE...

I offered the challenge in my Sunday School class today that we can set new resolutions, or attempts to improve old or bad habits, anytime, not just at a New Years.

And so I issued a November Resolution (to try to get more of them involved in our class discussions).

But I realized that I have been ignoring a little alarm that I have on my iPhone that prompts me each and every evening TO WRITE IN HERE.

So here is MY new resolution.

To write. 

I do have things on my mind - I do have thoughts that need more exploration - and I would like to become better at this.

Let the Challenge BEGIN!

OKAY, TODAY IS JANUARY 1ST....

Because of course the ONLY time you can begin new resolutions IS January 1st!

I miss writing - and it's something I would like to begin again.

Let's see if my daily alarm can get me back into the habit.

I do have a long, LONG list of items that I noted as possible blog topics, so at least I have some ideas.

OLD ideas, but ideas.

Wish me luck!

GOING GRAY, GOING BLUE

About ten years ago, I was heading out to California to visit my daughter and her family.


And I mentioned to two church friends this, and, jokingly, added, "Maybe I'll dye my hair blue while I'm out there."


Sudden silence.


And the one sister, looking at me extremely seriously, "But Hope, as Mormon women, we don't dye our hair!"


I could simply not take my hair off of her hair.







Streaked, blonde, coiffed .... DYED.

SEEING RED

Last night I ended up waiting at church until quite late for a group of young women to make it back to the chapel.

And a group of us parents were chatting about various random subjects; family, visitors, jobs.


But two of the gentlemen began exchanging 'war stories' about law enforcement situations.  
And since my husband began his military career as an MP, I was listening.

And heard the following exchange:

"This black guy was like crazy on drugs, it took six men to hold him down, he was fighting so hard!"

"Oh, then they should have gotten the dogs out; we used to use German Shepherds as police dogs, and you know how they go straight for them."



"Yeah, you're right, they're especially scared of dogs for just that reason!"

(and yes, the emphasis was in their speech)

(and yes, these two dudes are white)

It made me very, very sad.

BEING POLITE

I passed a man walking out of a store today, holding a lovely bunch of flowers which he had evidentially just purchased, and I was tempted to comment on them.

Something like lightheartedly exclaiming, "I hope those aren't because you are in trouble with your wife!"

When I suddenly realized that wouldn't at all be politically correct.

And that is NOT a bad thing.


What are the chances he is not actually married? Pretty good, really.

It could be for a girlfriend.

A boyfriend.

Even a husband.

And again, there is nothing at all wrong with me being aware of that.

It's called being polite.

Plain and simple.

THE BEST MOTHER-IN-LAW IN THE WORLD

DISCLAIMER: Yes, the photographs included in this blog are of the actress, Lynn Cohen, not the person I am blogging about - but I have very few photos of the actual person, and Lynn looks a LOT like her.



The last time I wrote a blog as a tribute to someone who had passed, it got pulled for legal reasons.

I wrote it about my aunt Sue, who died after a house fire was set - and it was pulled because a guy was being charged for setting the fire, and the "salute" might have caused undue sympathy in a jury pool... or some sort of asinine reason like that.

My mother-in-law passed away Tuesday evening, and I'm going to try once again.

I first met Sam just a couple of hours after her son and I had become engaged. I had agreed to go up and met her over the Thanksgiving break - Bill proposed to me on the drive up (during a snowstorm while driving on the freeway in Idaho) - and so he introduced us as, "Well, a funny thing happened on the drive here - here is your future daughter-in-law!"

I like Sam immediately - a sweet, white-haired little old lady (although she really wasn't that old!). And she liked me - I was very relaxed and up-front with her, and she and I stayed up and talked for a couple of hours while Bill went right to bed (he had done all the driving up there).

Sam was the ultimate small-town girl - she had born right outside of the town she lived in, had never learned to drive, never flown in a plane, and traveled probably at the most 400 miles away from her birthplace.

But whenever she was sitting down, she had a knitting needle or a crochet hook in her hand, and was always turning out amazing blankets, scarfs, dolls, animals, kitchen accessories... anything that would be put together with yarn!

She had raised her two kids alone - she said when she divorced her cheating husband, she didn't want to ever see him again or accept any money from him in child support or alimony. It wasn't easy - there were some very rough times - but she did it all on her own. And this is LONG before women's lib or feminism was afloat.

She lived in a tall wooden house her grandfather had helped built, and paid it off on her own. As her children moved out, she filled their bedrooms with stacks of yarn and craft projects.

The most time I spent with her was when our three kids and I lived with her, awaiting military housing to open up in Hawaii after our tour in Germany. It was a bit longer than three months, during one VERY hot summer in Oregon - but we had a lovely time. Sam was so happy to have her grandkids around - she had only one other grandchild up in Alaska - and never seemed to tire of them. 

And she had some great stories to tell about growing up in a small town, and knew, it seemed like, EVERYthing about the majority of Milton-Freewater residents - either from growing up with them, their family, and all their relations, or knowing them from working at Safeway, managing the local movie theatre, or working as a book-keeper at JCPenney.

Sam did it all - it wasn't until just a few years ago that dementia began to creep in, and she'd tell us the same stories repeatedly. But she stayed in her home by herself with her cat, Annie, until her health deteriorated enough that she needed to be hospitalized.

She was then moved into an assisted-living facility, but Bill found one that accepted her cat also - a VERY important consideration. She only lasted a few weeks, and it is comforting that she didn't suffer very long.

I'm going to miss her.

LIFE IS NOT WHAT YOU EXPECT

I have a personal theory as to why life is not what we want... or expect.


Everyone, and I mean EVERYone wants peace and harmony and love.


On their own terms, of course.


But that original desire for peace, harmony and love comes from our pre-mortal relationship with our Heavenly Parents.


And we want to get that feeling back.



But that isn't what life is about.


Life isn't fair.


It isn't kind.


And it isn't always even logical.


But that's the point.



It's a learning experience.


It's where we learn to make choices - and suffer consequences of those choices - at least most of them.


Good consequences - and bad ones.


The hope is that you learn from all of this.

And that's the plan.

PRAYING

The Lord's prayer includes something I had never noticed before:

"Give us this day our daily bread."

I just had never thought about it.

But it puts something in perspective.

I don't think life is supposed to be easy - or fair. 

Mortality is a test - and a trial - the ultimate learning experience. 

We have no idea how long we have here.

So I firmly believe in the adage "one day at a time."

Yes, I'll plan ahead for retirement.

I'll think about what may happen next week.

But I feel our main purpose is focusing on the here and now.

And part of that is not asking for blessings in the future - it's asking for the here and now.

Our daily bread.

SLEEPING POSITIONS

I may be developing an unhealthy relationship with my animals.


I do have a lap horse - if it were at all possible, he would curl up and sit in my lap... all 1,200 lb. of him.


That's not my fault, that's just the way he is.


And I know cats are attracted to heat, regardless of it's source.


I just don't think of myself as a hot enough person to ALWAYS have the cat asleep right next to me.



But my dog.... that's where it's getting more than a little weird.  She's a cuddler. 




And I'm not.  At least not while sleeping.


But I am becoming very accustomed to having a warm furry body scrunched up right against my back.


With a cat, under the covers, on the other side, asleep behind my knees.

I feel just like the peanut butter in the sandwich.