GOING BACKWARDS?

I have the art of procrastination honed down to almost perfection.



I can put off even the simplest matters for an obscene amount of time, even when it is something I don't even really mind doing. It just sometimes is more fun to wait until the situation has become sort of a crisis.



And, of course, part of the human tendency to delay seems to come from the completely illogical and vain hope that the task will somehow vanish.



It's amazing how we let something which we choose to do (or rather, NOT do) affect our stress level. With me, at least, it getS to the point where if the task had simply been done when originally presented, I would have avoided tension headaches, worried stomach AND the constant concern wearing me down.



Can you tell that I have a stack of items right next to my keyboard which I am avoiding?

NEVER PUT OFF UNTIL TOMORROW THAT WHICH YOU CAN PUT OFF UNTIL THE DAY AFTER TOMORROW

I have a pile of papers that need action, and I keep shuffling them around the desk.

So the following fits perfectly:

1. I believe that if anything is worth doing, it would have been done already.

2. I shall never move quickly, except to avoid more work or find excuses.

3. I will never rush into a job without a lifetime of consideration.

4. I shall meet all of my deadlines directly in proportion to the amount of bodily injury I could expect from missing them.

5. I firmly believe that tomorrow holds the possibility for new technologies, astounding discoveries, and a reprieve from my obligations.

6. I truly believe that all deadlines are unreasonable regardless of the amount of time given.

7. I shall never forget that the probability of a miracle, though infinitesimally small, is not exactly zero.

8. If at first I don't succeed, there is always next year.

9. I shall always decide not to decide, unless of course I decide to change my mind.

10. I shall always begin, start, initiate, take the first step, and/or write the first word, when I get around to it.

11. I obey the law of inverse excuses which demands that the greater the task to be done, the more insignificant the work that must be done prior to beginning the greater task.

12. I know that the work cycle is not plan/start/finish, but is wait/plan/plan.

13. I will never put off tomorrow, what I can forget about forever.

14. I will become a member of the ancient Order of Two-Headed Turtles (The Procrastinator's Society) if they ever get it organized.