LEAVING ON A JET PLANE... PART TWO

Now we're through security, and into the main part of the airport.

And this I simply love.

It's people walking briskly and purposely to their gates - or at least trying to appear purposeful as they try to find out where their gate is.

There's your gargantuan restrooms that echo with banging stall doors and people trying to fit their carry-on luggage in the actual stall with them - I still believe they are designed to overcompensate for the broom closet restrooms on the planes.

And my favorite - all the food. Overpriced, over processed, over packaged dry sandwiches -- huge cookies all wrapped in cellophane - grande size sodas - huge bags of candy, sweets and squishy fish and worms. And since it's impossible to get any food through security, you are at their complete mercy.

The restaurants, I must admit I avoid. Everyone seems to be drinking and using an obscene amount of condiments on huge slabs of meat (I'm predominantly a vegetarian) and suddenly becoming extremely friendly with any attractive stranger standing near them at the bar (and I'm predominantly non-attractive).

And then everyone stages themselves in the waiting area by the gate. The first-class and first-time fliers put themselves right by the gate, carefully sitting in the sling-type chairs with a minimum of one empty seat between. The coach fliers, and those who fly regularly, sit in the remaining rows, with college students folding themselves to the floor so they can keep logged in with the internet.

And I sit as far away as I can while still being able to dimly hear the announcements. I can't figure out to this day why the first-class people are boarded first, and why they WANT to be on the airplane when the rest of us, at least on smaller aircraft, are forced to slowly move past them and (inadvertently?) bang them with the carry-on luggage.

Although I completely understand why people pay the extra money for first-class - each time I squeeze into my seat and hike my knees up against the seat in front of me, I wish wish wish I could have gone and gotten a first-class seat - I hate feeling like a pretzel scrunched up with warm bodies pressing me back on every side.

I try to be an agreeable seat-partner - I don't try to take up extra space, I do keep my elbows in, I don't play with the lights (although I absolutely MUST have the air vent blowing right on me - the only way I don't get airsick).

But by the end of even the very short hops from Tucson to Phoenix, or LA to San Diego, I am already weary of every one's deodorant scent, and what they ate before the boarded, and am convinced I've caught pneumonia from that dude coughing in the row behind me.

So the final ending is landing, tumbling out of the crowded plane, gathering your belongings and running into the arms of someone you love at that destination.

LEAVING ON A JET PLANE... ONCE AGAIN

I fly out Tuesday morning to go visit my daughter and family.

I sorta like flying - and I sorta hate it.

I honestly do like going to the airport, parking in long-term parking, riding that silly little tram, checking in for my ticket. There's a sense of excitement, of anticipation, that's almost palatable.

Until you get to the security check-in.

Then suddenly I, at least, am looking at every other passenger as a potential terrorist.

Nah, I don't really. But I think a lot of the passengers think that you are viewing them as terrorists. Because the TSA agents are being paid to do just that.

And even though you know that everything in your bag is clear and above boards, all of a sudden you get just a thought - is that shampoo going to pass as 3 oz.? What about that toothpaste? Will the prescription meds you have be allowed, or will they spill out your pills and accuse you of drug smuggling?

I keep forgetting to take my belt off, and having that trigger the alarm when you walk through.

But then everything passes, and you get to frantically gather your opened bags, your shoes and purse as the things get spilled out from the x-ray machine, and keep hold of and track of everything while you are putting your footwear back on.

Then the atmosphere relaxes again, and you're back with the anticipation and excitement of getting on a plane in a little bit.

And THAT part I will comment on tomorrow.