CURSED AND DAMNED

I don't live a tough life. I live an extremely sheltered one.

I have a dishwasher. I use a Swiffer for the six square feet of linoleum in my house; vacuum for the rest.

I wear leather gloves when I'm fooling around with the animals outside, and if I am actually doing some work (such as patching the hay shed when rain unexpectedly falls from the Arizona sky).

I don't even have piles and piles of paperwork to file.

So why am I so cursed with recurring - nay, incessant paper-cuts, split fingernails. and torn cuticles?!

Have I somehow offended the unknown deity of cellulose? Should I be making offerings of shredded newspapers? Do I need to bow down and worship some kind of paper machie model?

Please, please, does anyone know of a cure... besides constantly slathering my hands with lotion, wearing band-aids and gloves 24/7?

Hey - that sounds like a great diet aid!